i am KATRINA. a filipino citizen who loves making fangirly-noise.
i love massu, tegoshi, tegomass, news, daichii, hikanoo, kisumai, and pigs.
i love the TEGOMASSU pairing.
i love making graphics and anything that has to do with tegomasu and news
my journal has few RL rants, most of the time, it's just pure fangirling
i write fics but i kind of got lazy on writing recently.
♥ ♥ ♥


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A Prologue to a New Fandom ; Epilogue in Manila

My friends around here in LJ who are also my friends in Facebook may probably know about this already.
I'm Bangtaned. LOL as much as I wanna update this journal about this, I just don't have enough time to do it. Would probably revamp the entire thing (also my Tumblr) with this new fandom.

On a more important note... I got to see them on their concert last July 30. :D

Someday, I'll get to rant about all my feels during that day. :)) I seriously am missing being active here.
Bye for now. Please do leave a message if I'm missing anything about your lives. ;)

おひさしぶり!!! (´O`)

Hello guys!
And as the title says, it has been a while.
I miss posting here about my rants and all but due to the busy schedule I have at work, I could only do them all on facebook.

I'm still a fan. I still follow Jpop. I still love NEWS and Tegomass. However, I'm not that active compared to how I was before.

You can still flail about them with me tho!
It's just that I'm not much updated anymore. Pfft.

My working environment has changed. And with it, my views and lifestyle had totally changed as well. I'm teaching Japanese businessmen, consultants and accountants. Aside from providing them strict training in using English, I also lead their speech workshop. I used to hate public speaking but I learned a lot from this! I even learned a lot about the Japanese culture. You see, my students are way older than me (average of 35 years old) and they always talk about their life, their country's issues and economic situation. It's like seeing Japan in a newer point of view. I found out how otaku or pop culture is not accepted well enough by adults... that Johnny's or AKB has pretty much negative image for some. Sad to say, I had to keep my fangirl side in sacrifice for professional conversations. The usual scenario is... "Do you like Janizu?"... and I'm like - "I know but I'm not a fan". It's difficult.

If there's anything I am grateful for the change the most... it's the physical attributes. I somehow lost weight (?) HAHA! I said it myself. But seriously, I can already wear the skirts and dresses I used to ignore in my closet. Make-ups and regular retouch is already a part of my life too.

I have lots of stories in my head that I want to share but I'll just save it for next time.

With this... how are you?

I miss you all! ♪♥


the olds news

happy 7th year to my lj ★

greeting my journal after skipping the 6th year post LOL
also, happy birthday to my sister Kristel and happy anniversary to my dear bias group NEWS.
errr, i'm sure i'll fail on making a decent post for their anniv so... just making sure i've greeted them!

wow, my journal has been active for those many years heeee~~h, just kidding.
of course i obviously cheated since i rarely posted after papa was gone and i've been eaten by real life.
i'm sooo active on fb though!

anyway, i hope i can catch up to everyone!
i miss reading my f-list feed. nudge me if you feel like telling me something interesting! :)

hugs and kisses to all my dear friends ;)
cry baby


hi everyone. just passing by and checking on all of you :)
i may not be around much here in lj but i'm still in the fandom. LOL
hope you're all doing well. i would love to hear from you guys. ^^
cry baby


i feel like livejournal's becoming my breather when it comes to real life stuff/rants, well... aside from twitter (which i only open whenever i feel annoyed about life and all)
i'm really getting so frustrated lately. i'm looking for a part time job coz the company i'm working for right now (and as usual) is not going well, and i need money so bad. ;___; the one i applied for did not accept me for technical reason (internet connection LOL). for the first time after a long time, i felt that sad feeling of being rejected again; orz

i also wanted to pursue my dream of writing stories again but i always think my works are not appealing. i wanted to submit stories while publishing companies here in our country are supporting contemporary writers T^T but i don't have much confidence. :(

i want to improve on my drawing too... be able to draw better coz my style isn't going anywhere.

i want to live alone because mom and i are having more misunderstandings and fights lately. i almost ran away from home last time :(
she's been treating me like a teenager again when i'm already reaching 27.

i want to get my motivations back on running sites related to fandom.

i want to take up culinary/baking class, and japanese classes too.

i want to do so many things!!!

i want to find myself...
cry baby

Dear Papa,

it's been a month since you were gone.
exactly, 36 days when you left to be with our Lord.
i always talk about wanting to move on, but in reality i don't want to.
i still can't believe you're gone already. we've just known about your sickness last May, how come you're not with us anymore? it was just 6 months, why? it's so fast. :(
i had so many plans for you once you get better. i had a dream of bringing you to a very nice place so you can relax. i had a dream of making you see my future family.
papa, i miss you so much,
the last time i've seen you alive, i did not even get to kiss or hug you.
i just bid goodbye on a sunday to go to cavite, and i came back home just to learn you were gone on a tuesday :'(
it's so painful each time i remember how i left the house without any idea it'll be my last chance to see you T^T

it's so lonely without you papa.
i feel like i'm living a lie everyday. like this was all just a dream and one day i'll wake up and you're there. alive and smiling. :(
wherever you are right now, please watch over us. please be happier there. i love you papa.

your daughter Katrina ;__;
cry baby

when your strength... is getting weak (´・_・`)

as some of you know already, especially if you're in my facebook since i'm posting my RL rants there instead... my dad's condition has gotten worse. can't believe the last time i talked about his case was four months ago, in THIS post. believe it or not, after that incident, so many things had happened and changed in my life. that time, i thought it's a kind of sickness which he can recover within some time. i thought he'll feel better after a month or two. at first, the diagnosis were showing he has liver cirrhosis... dad has undergone so many lab tests to make sure what really was his condition.

he has liver cancer.

we never expected someone in the family will have it. no one among us or our relatives suffered cancer before. it's the first time. it's shocking and devastating, we didn't know how to handle such case. for the past few months, he's been in and out of the hospital.
my dad who used to be so healthy and cheerful is now losing his health. it breaks my heart to see his thin body, his eyes getting weak, and his voice turning to whispers. sometimes, he has to do in gesture or write what he wants to say. he wears diapers now, but he never asked me to change for him. it seems he's embarrassed about it... :'( actually, that's one thing that makes me feel useless. :(

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